The Forsyte Saga, Volume 3 Read online

  ‘How was he looking?’

  ‘Dreadful, I thought. Very strange and strained, as if under the power of some terrible thought.’

  ‘Yes?’

  ‘Mrs Ferse asked him if he had had dinner, and if he would like to go to bed; and if he would see a doctor; but he wouldn’t speak – he sat with his eyes closed, almost as if he might be asleep, until at last I whispered: “Is he asleep, d’you think?” Then suddenly he cried out: “Sleep! I’m for it again, and I won’t stand it. By God! I won’t stand it.” ’

  When she had repeated those words of Ferse, Dinny understood better than hitherto what is meant by the expression ‘sensation in Court’; in some mysterious way she had supplied what had been lacking to the conviction carried by the witnesses who had preceded her. Whether she had been wise in this, she was utterly unable to decide; and her eyes sought Adrian’s face. He gave her an almost imperceptible nod.

  ‘Yes, Miss Cherrell?’

  ‘Mrs Ferse went towards him, and he cried out: “Leave me alone. Go away!” I think she said: “Ronald, won’t you see someone just to give you something to make you sleep?” but he sprang up and cried out violently: “Go away! I’ll see no one – no one!” ’

  ‘Yes, Miss Cherrell, what then?’

  ‘We were frightened. We went up to my room and consulted, and I said we ought to telephone.’

  ‘To whom?’

  ‘To Mrs Ferse’s doctor. She wanted to go, but I prevented her and ran down. The telephone was in the little study on the ground floor, and I was just getting the number when I felt my hand seized, and there was Captain Ferse behind me. He cut the wire with a knife. Then he stood holding my arm, and I said: “That’s silly, Captain Ferse; you know we wouldn’t hurt you.” He let me go, and put his knife away, and told me to put on my shoes, because I had them in my other hand.’

  ‘You mean you had taken them off?’

  ‘Yes, to run down quietly. I put them on. He said: “I’m not going to be messed about. I shall do what I like with myself.” I said: “You know we only want your good.” And he said: “I know that good – no more of that for me.” And then he looked out of the window and said: “It’s raining like hell,” and turned to me and cried: “Get out of this room, quick. Get out!” and I flew back upstairs again.’

  Dinny paused and took a long breath. This second living through those moments was making her heart beat. She closed her eyes.

  ‘Yes, Miss Cherrell, what then?’

  She opened her eyes. There was the coroner still, and there the jury with their mouths a little open, as it seemed.

  ‘I told Mrs Ferse. We didn’t know what to do or what was coming – we didn’t see what we could do, and I suggested that we should drag the bed against the door and try to sleep.’

  ‘And did you?’

  ‘Yes; but we were awake a long time. Mrs Ferse was so exhausted that she did sleep at last, and I think I did towards morning. Anyway the maid woke me by knocking.’

  ‘Did you hear nothing further of Captain Ferse during the night?’

  The old school-boy saying ‘If you tell a lie, tell a good ’un,’ shot through her mind, and she said firmly: ‘No, nothing.’

  ‘What time was it when you were called?’

  ‘Eight o’clock. I woke Mrs Ferse and we went down at once. Captain Ferse’s dressing-room was in disorder, and he seemed to have lain upon the bed; but he was nowhere in the house; and his hat and overcoat were gone from the chair where he had thrown them down in the hall.’

  ‘What did you do then?’

  ‘We consulted, and Mrs Ferse wanted to go to her doctor and to her cousin and mine, Mr Michael Mont, the Member of Parliament; but I thought if I could get my uncles they would be better able to trace Captain Ferse; so I persuaded her to come with me to my Uncle Adrian and ask him to get my Uncle Hilary and see if they could find Captain Ferse. I knew they were both very clever men and very tactful,’ Dinny saw the coroner bow slightly towards her uncles, and hurried on, ‘and they were old family friends; I thought if they couldn’t manage to find him without publicity, nobody could. So we went to my Uncle Adrian, and he agreed to get my Uncle Hilary to help him and try; then I took Mrs Ferse down with me to the children at Condaford, and that’s all I know, Sir.’

  The coroner bowed quite low towards her and said: ‘Thank you, Miss Cherrell. You have given your evidence admirably.’ The jury moved uneasily as if trying to bow too, and Dinny, with an effort, stepped down from the pen and took her seat beside Hilary, who put his hand on hers. She sat very still, and then was conscious that a tear, as it were the last of the sal volatile, was moving slowly down her cheek. Listening dully to what followed, the evidence of the Doctor in charge of the Mental Home, and the coroner’s address, then waiting dumbly for the jury’s verdict, she suffered from the feeling that in her loyalty to the living she had been disloyal to the dead. It was a horrid sensation, that: of having borne evidence of mania against one who could not defend or explain himself; and it was with a fearful interest that she watched the jury file back into their seats, and the foreman stand up in answer to the demand for their verdict.

  ‘We find that the deceased died from falling down a chalk pit.’

  ‘That,’ said the coroner, ‘is death from misadventure.’

  ‘We wish to express our sympathy with the widow.’

  Dinny almost clapped her hands. So! They had given him the benefit of the doubt – those disused men! And with a sudden, almost personal, warmth she tilted her head up and smiled at them.

  Chapter Thirty-one

  WHEN she had come to from smiling, Dinny perceived that her uncle was looking at her quizzically.

  ‘Can we go now, Uncle Hilary?’

  ‘It would be as well, Dinny, before you’ve quite vamped the foreman.’

  Outside, in the damp October air, for the day was English autumn personified, she said:

  ‘Let’s go for a little breather, Uncle, and get the smell of that Court out of us.’

  They turned down towards the distant sea, walking at a good pace.

  ‘I’m frightfully anxious to know what went before me, Uncle; did I say anything contradictory?’

  ‘No. It came out at once in Diana’s evidence that Ferse had come back from the Home, and the coroner treated her tenderly. It was lucky they called me before Adrian, so that his evidence was only a repetition of mine, and he was no way conspicuous. I feel quite sorry for the journalists. Juries avoid suicide and unsound mind when they can, and, after all, we don’t know what happened to poor Ferse at that last minute. He may quite easily have run on over the edge, it was pretty blind there and the light was failing.’

  ‘Do you really think that, Uncle?’

  Hilary shook his head. ‘No, Dinny. I think he meant to do it all along, and that was the nearest place to his old home. And, though I say it that shouldn’t, thank God he did, and is at rest.’

  ‘Yes, oh! yes! What will happen to Diana and Uncle Adrian, now?’

  Hilary filled his pipe and stopped to light it. ‘Well, my dear, I’ve given Adrian some advice. I don’t know whether he’ll take it, but you might back it up if you get a chance. He’s waited all these years. He’d better wait another.’

  ‘Uncle, I agree terribly.’

  ‘Oh!’ said Hilary, surprised.

  ‘Yes. Diana is simply not fit to think even of him. She ought to be left to herself and the children.’

  ‘I’m wondering,’ said Hilary, ‘whether one couldn’t wangle some “bones” expedition that would take him out of England for a year.’

  ‘Hallorsen!’ said Dinny, clasping her hands: ‘He’s going again. And he loves Uncle Adrian.’

  ‘Good! But would he take him?’

  ‘If I asked him,’ said Dinny, simply.

  Hilary again gave her a quizzical look. ‘What a dangerous young woman you are! I daresay the Trustees would give Adrian leave. I can set old Shropshire and Lawrence on to it. We must go back now, Dinny. I�
�ve got to catch a train. It’s distressing, because this air smells good; but the Meads are pining for me.’

  Dinny slipped her hand through his arm.

  ‘I do admire you, Uncle Hilary.’

  Hilary stared. ‘I doubt if I follow you, my dear.’

  ‘Oh! you know what I mean: you’ve got all the old “I serve” tradition, and that kind of thing; and yet you’re so frightfully up-to-date, and tolerant, and free-thinking.’

  ‘H’m!’ said Hilary, emitting a cloud of smoke.

  ‘I’m sure you believe in birth control?’

  ‘Well,’ said Hilary, ‘the position there is ironical for us parsons. It used to be considered unpatriotic to believe in limiting our population. But now that flying and poison gas have made food for powder unnecessary, and unemployment is rampant, I’m afraid there’s no question but that it’s unpatriotic not to believe in limiting our population. As for our Christian principles; being patriots, we didn’t apply the Christian principle “Thou shalt not kill” during the war, so, being patriots, we can’t logically apply the Christian principle “Thou shalt not limit” now. Birth control is essential for the slums anyway.’

  ‘And you don’t believe in hell.’

  ‘I do, they’ve got it.’

  ‘You support games on Sundays, don’t you?’ Hilary nodded. ‘And sun bathing with nothing on?’

  ‘I might, if there were any sun.’

  ‘And pyjamas and smoking for women.’

  ‘Not stinkers; emphatically not stinkers.’

  ‘I call that undemocratic.’

  ‘I can’t help it, Dinny. Sniff!’ And he puffed some smoke at her.

  Dinny sniffed. ‘There’s latakia in that, it does smell good; but women can’t smoke pipes. I suppose we all have a blind spot somewhere, and yours is: “No stinkers.” Apart from that you’re amazingly modern, Uncle. When I was in that Court looking at all those people, it seemed to me that yours was the only really modern face.’

  ‘It’s a Cathedral town, my dear.’

  ‘Well, I think the amount of modernity is awfully over-estimated.’

  ‘You don’t live in London, Dinny. All the same, you’re right in a way. Frankness about things is not change. The difference between the days of my youth and today is only the difference of expression. We had doubts, we had curiosity, we had desires; but we didn’t express them. Now they do. I see a lot of young ’Varsity men – they come and work in the Meads, you know. Well, from their cradles they’ve been brought up to say whatever comes into their heads, and just don’t they? We didn’t, you know; but the same things came into our heads. That’s all the difference. That and cars.’

  ‘Then I’m still old-fashioned. I’m not a bit good at expressing things.’

  ‘That’s your sense of humour, Dinny. It acts as a restraint, and keeps you self-conscious. Few young people nowadays seem to have much sense of humour; they often have wit – it isn’t the same thing. Our young writers, and painters and musicians, could they carry on as they do if they could see a joke against themselves? Because that’s the real test of humour.’

  ‘I’ll think that over.’

  ‘Yes, but don’t lose your sense of humour, Dinny. It’s the scent to the rose. Are you going back to Condaford now?’

  ‘I expect so, Hubert’s remand won’t be till after that mail boat comes in, and that’s not for ten days yet.’

  ‘Well, give my love to Condaford. I don’t suppose I’ll ever have days again quite so good as when we were children there.’

  ‘That’s what I was thinking, Uncle, when I was waiting to be the last little nigger boy.’

  ‘You’re a bit young for that conclusion, Dinny. Wait till you’re in love.’

  ‘I am.’

  ‘What, in love?’

  ‘No, in waiting.’

  ‘Fearsome process, being in love,’ said Hilary. ‘Still, I never regretted it.’

  Dinny gazed at him sideways, and her teeth showed.

  ‘What if you took it again, Uncle?’

  ‘Ah! there,’ said Hilary, knocking his pipe out on a pillar box, ‘I’m definitely out of it. In my profession we can’t run to it. Besides, I’ve never really got over my first attack.’

  ‘No,’ said Dinny, with compunction, ‘Aunt May’s such a duck.’

  ‘You’ve said a mouthful. Here’s the station. Good-bye, and bless you! I sent my bag down this morning.’ He waved his hand and was gone.

  On reaching the hotel Dinny sought Adrian. He was not in, and, rather disconsolate, she wandered out again into the Cathedral. She was just about to sit down and take its restful beauty in, when she saw her Uncle standing against a column with his eyes fixed on the rose window. Going up she slid her arm through his. He squeezed it, but said nothing.

  ‘Fond of glass, Uncle?’

  ‘Terribly fond of good glass, Dinny. Ever see York Minster?’

  Dinny shook her head; then, conscious that nothing she could say would lead up to what she wanted to say, she asked directly: ‘What are you going to do now, Uncle dear?’

  ‘Have you been talking to Hilary?’

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘He wants me to keep away for a year.’

  ‘So do I.’

  ‘It’s a long time, Dinny; I’m getting on.’

  ‘Would you go on Professor Hallorsen’s expedition if he wanted you?’

  ‘He wouldn’t want me.’

  ‘Yes, he would.’

  ‘I could only go if I were certain that Diana wished it.’

  ‘She would never say so, but I’m quite sure she wants complete rest for a long time.’

  ‘When you worship the sun,’ said Adrian, very low, ‘it is hard to go where the sun never shines.’

  Dinny squeezed his arm. ‘I know; but you’d have it to look forward to. And it’s a nice healthy expedition this time, only to New Mexico. You’d come back very young, with hair all down the outsides of your legs. They do in the films. You’d be irresistible, Uncle; and I do want you to be irresistible. All that’s wanted is to let the tumult and the shouting die.’

  ‘And my job?’

  ‘Oh! that can be wangled all right. If Diana doesn’t have to think of anything for a year, she’ll be a different creature, and you will seem like the promised land. I do feel I know what I’m talking about.’

  ‘You’re an endearing little serpent,’ said Adrian, with his shadowy smile.

  ‘Diana is pretty badly wounded.’

  ‘I sometimes think it’s a mortal wound, Dinny.’

  ‘No, no!’

  ‘Why should she think of me again, if I once go away?’

  ‘Because women are like that.’

  ‘What do you know about women, at your age? I went away long ago, and she thought of Ferse. I fancy I’m made of the wrong stuff.’

  ‘If you are, New Mexico’s the very place. You’ll come back a “he-man”. Think of that! I promise to watch over her, and the children will keep you to the fore. They’re always talking of you. And I’ll see that they go on doing it.’

  ‘It’s certainly curious,’ said Adrian, impersonally, ‘but I feel she’s further from me now than when Ferse was alive.’

  ‘For the moment, and it’ll be a long moment. But I know it’ll dry straight in the long run. Really, Uncle.’

  Adrian was silent a long time. Then he said:

  ‘I’ll go, Dinny, if Hallorsen will take me.’

  ‘He shall. Bend down, Uncle. I must kiss you.’

  Adrian bent down. The kiss lighted on his nose. A verger coughed….

  The return to Condaford was made by car that afternoon in precisely the same order, young Tasburgh drivirfg. He had been extremely tactful during these twenty-four hours, had not proposed at all, and Dinny was proportionately grateful. If Diana wanted peace, so did she. Alan left that same evening, Diana and the children the following day, and Clare came back from her long stay in Scotland, so that none but her own family were at the Grange. Yet had she no peace.
For now that the preoccupation with poor Ferse was gone, she was oppressed and worried by the thought of Hubert. Extraordinary what power of disturbance was in that overhanging issue! He and Jean wrote cheerfully from the East Coast. According to themselves they were not worrying. Dinny was. And she knew that her mother, and even more her father, were. Clare was more angry than worried, and the effect of anger on her was to stimulate her energy, so that she went ‘cubbing’ with her father; and in the afternoons would disappear with the car to neighbouring houses, where she would often stay till after dinner. The festive member of the family, she was always in great request. Dinny had her anxiety to herself. She had written to Hallorsen about her uncle, sending him the promised photograph, which depicted her in her presentation frock of two years back, when she and Clare had been economically presented together. Hallorsen answered promptly: ‘The picture is just too lovely. Nothing will please me more than to take your uncle. I am getting in touch with him rightaway’: he signed himself ‘Always your devoted servant.’

  She read the letter gratefully, but without a tremor, and called herself a hard-hearted beast. Her mind thus set at rest about Adrian, for she knew his year of leave could be safely left to Hilary, she thought all the time of Hubert with a growing presentiment of evil. She tried to persuade herself that this came from having nothing particular to do, from the reaction after Ferse, and the habit of nerves into which he had thrown her; but such excuses were unconvincing. If they did not believe Hubert sufficiently here to refuse his extradition, what chance would he have out there? She spent surreptitious minutes staring at the map of Bolivia, as if its conformation could give her insight into the psychology of its people. She had never loved Condaford more passionately than during these uneasy days. The place was entailed, and if Hubert were sent out there and condemned, or died in prison, or was murdered by one of those muleteers, and if Jean had no son, it would pass away to Hilary’s eldest boy – a cousin she had barely seen, a boy at school; in the family, yes, but as good as lost. With Hubert’s fate was wrapped up the fate of her beloved home. And, though astonished that she could think of herself at all, when it meant so terribly much more to Hubert, she never quite lost the thought.